Now here's a match up, sports fans: Dave Barry versus the information superhighway, mano mano. Self-proclaimed computer geek and Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist Dave starts off his rip-roaring tour with the most important computer tip of all: "Never read the instructions," and slides from there into the world of hardware, software, error messages, autocache, Windows 95 and the critical issue of RAM. "The function of RAM," according to Dave, "is to give guys a way of deciding whose computer has the biggest, most tumescent memory...The bottom line is, if you're a guy, you cannot have enough RAM. Bill Gates currently has over 743 billion 'megs' of RAM and he still routinely feels the need to stuff a zucchini in his underwear."

Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winnings syndicated columnist for the Miami Herald.